January 23, 2017

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Bad dance moves

American poet Edwin Denby once observed: is a bit of insanity in dancing that does everybody a great deal of good. While it hard to argue with Denby logic, it is important to limit that insanity as much as possible. Luckily for you, we compiled a list of 10 of the most wretched dance moves in the history of human locomotion. Simply avoid executing these bad dance moves and you be well on your way to becoming the king of the backseat mambo. And if you insist on keeping these bad dance moves in your repertoire welcome to singledom.

Number 10 The Moonwalk The moonwalk, or backslide, as it often called, was invented by French mime Marcel Marceau and later perfected by Michael Jackson, America most talented white dancer. Sadly, much like Jacko himself, this dance craze went out of fashion more than a decade ago. Unless you an actual astronaut or a one gloved entertainer, you have no business trying to execute this tragically outdated move in public. Although it looks great on a stage, it has always been a bad dance move anywhere else.

Number 9 The Achy Breaky Bad Mistakey There are some trends that are best left un revived. That certainly the case with the Achy Breaky, a complicated crotch thrusting line dance inspired by the Billy Ray Cyrus song. Much like bathtub hooch and dating your sister, this is one redneck trend you should definitely steer clear of unless performing bad dance moves trips your trigger.

Number 8 The Back Spin Arguably the most complicated move on this list of bad dance moves, the back spin is a favorite move among old school B boys. It also a one way ticket to your chiropractor. Unless you 13 years old and can put your body through the head of a tennis racket, this is one trick you should leave out of your repertoire. While you at it, you should also eschew head spins, shoulder spins, elbow spins, butt spins, and any other bad dance moves that make your body resemble an out of control top.

Number 7 The Hammer Dance, aka Hammer Time Albert Einstein once said, are the athletes of God. It a lovely little sentiment, but it makes us suspect that Al Glover Quin Jersey never saw anyone doing the Hammer Dance. Popularized by MC Hammer himself, this putrid piece of choreography is achieved by shuffling back and forth while keeping your legs wide apart and slightly bent. Naturally, it helps if your pants contain 18 cubic feet of material, but any old pair of acid washed jeans will do. This is just one of many bad dance moves we glad died in the

Number 6 The Ickey Shuffle Touchdown dances are best left on the gridiron, which is precisely where you should leave Matt Prater Jersey this embarrassingly bad dance move. Originated by former Cincinnati Bengals running back Ickey Woods, the Ickey Shuffle requires the Jason Jones Jersey dancer to extend his right arm and shuffle two steps to his right and then extend his left arm and shuffle two steps to his left. It a little bit like the hokey pokey only much, much Rashean Mathis Lions Jersey harder to live down.

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