Jackdaw

I have recently adopted a policy of not watching programmes that are likely to irritate me.
However,a flaw in the plan emerged last night.At 10.15 I switched to ITV to find that I'd missed 75 minutes of the delectable Maggie O'Neill in 'Vincent'.Rats!!!!
This prompted the thought that television sets of the future should have a programmable device installed.
Said device would bring up on-screen alerts whenever your favourites were scheduled to appear,and conversely,whenever your 'betes noires' were looming.
Thus much frustration and verbal/physical abuse of the TV set would be avoided.
The two 'alert lists' would designated 'Treat' and 'Tw*t' respectively,eg.,

Treats

Peter Kaye - Witty,warm observational comedian and writer.
Maggie O'Neill - Beautiful,versatile actress with vulnerable quality.
Frank Gardner - Incisive,intelligent and well-informed BBC Security Correspondent.
Neil Stuke - Versatile leading man and character actor.
John Henshaw - Tough-looking character actor with warm,humorous side.

Tw*ts

Andrew Davies - Butcher of exccellent novels.
Ian 'Wrighty' Wright - Morons' football pundit and presenter of cack TV.
Trevor McDonald - Of Homeresque stare and misplaced stress syndrome.
Neil 'Wring 'em out Ladies' Morrissey - Lottery winner and king of quirky physical comedy.
Adrian Chiles - Egocentric presenter and full-time Baggies bore.

You get the idea!
Any more suggestions?

Cheers

Jacky

Marky B

[img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/thumbsup.gif[/img]

I once shot an elephant in my pyjamas - how he got in my pyjamas,I'll never know

sanndevil

It already exists. It's called TIVO. [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/clapping.gif[/img]

Jackdaw

Late again!
Another potential source of royalties goes astray.

Cheers (sigh)

Jacky

David Brent

The delectable Maggie has been mentioned several times in the Sexiest Actress thread [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tongue.gif[/img]

I think the television of the future should also be able to alert you to all the "naughty bits" that are coming up in films/programs featuring your favourite actresses. Being 'glued' to the set could have a whole new meaning. [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/shocking.gif[/img]

Cheers!

Dave.

Aenima

IMHO Peter Kay has gone from the first category to the second on the strength of PADDY AND MAX. I do hope he manages to jump back to the Treats section some time soon.
cheers,
A

I'll 'av 'arf

Jackdaw

I quite agree with you re PADDY AND MAX.Embarassing wasn't it?
However,he has so much credit in the bank with me for 'Phoenix Nights','The Services' and 'The World's oldest Paperboy' etc.,that I'm prepared to overlook the odd aberration.Not too keen on his stand-up either to be honest!

Cheers

Jacky

tonewheel

tonewheel

there are just to many tw**ts on tv to mention but I'm going to try .What about Cilla Black for a start she never could sing and yet her irritating voice has been scorching our eardrums for the last 40 odd years.Ant &Dec what are they? Mr. smarm himself Alan titchmarsh.and the git in shorts & fancy braces who pretends to be a builder Tommy Walsh. Jamie Oliver, We won't go to Sainsbury's in case he's in there. The list is endless.Wow I feel a lot better now.
All the v Best
Tonewheel

Bryanb

how about a voice recognition box on the set.... so as soon as you say, oh god no, it switches itself over to another channel [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif[/img]