Coping With Cold Callers

[bhowells]

How many of you out there get so pig sick of cold callers that you resort to unchareterisic rudeness. They always ring on a Monday night when I come home from work, I have told a couple of them to bugger off or worse.

A double glazing firm used to plague my wife and I mercilessly by cold calling and knocking on the door. As a result I did register with the telephone preference service, however I dont think it stops all sales calls.

We still get plagued from companies asking us to take part in surveys an independent mortgage firms ring as well

Anyone not registered wit hte TPS strongly urge you to do so.

[marker]

I must admit to letting go at these people particularly when the same one rings more than once. they just don't take no for an answer I have now joined the TPS and most of it has stopped I think we all need to read any form we have to fill in carefully and opt out of any promotions I thought the crap government were going to do something along the lines of having to opt in instead of out or was that just promises/lies.
If these people came banging at my door they would get thrown out

[Steve Crook]

The TPS does stop the vast majority of sales calls. Just like the MPS stops a lot, but not all, junk mail.

In fact I almost regret registering with the TPS. I used to have a lot of fun with them

If you are registered for the TPS, one thing to do is to ask them if their company uses the TPS lists. If they say they do then tell them that you're on the list and that by calling you they've just cost their company £100 which the company will probably take out of their commission. As their on a pittance, this is probably a few months worth of commission and it really gets them worried. The company won't really be fined of course but it does make them pay attention to those TPS lists


One other one I used to like doing was to anticipate the script they were working to. This is usually along the lines of
[Establish identity of person being called]
[Are they able to make decisions?]
[Are they at all interested]
[Main sales spiel]

I'm sure you've all been through that lot.
"Hello, is that Mr Crook?" - "Yes"
"Are you the householder Mr Crook?" - "Yes"
"Are you interested in new doors and windows?"
Now this is where you must express an interest to make them go into the main sales spiel - which involves them talking for about 5 minutes without you having to say anything. They just want you to sit there and listen.
As soon as they start, you put the phone down - don't hang up, just put the phone down - and go and make a cup of tea.
Sometimes I've heard them sobbing when I get back

Yes it's cruel. But if they choose to sup with the devil they'd better use a mighty long spoon or they're liable to get hurt

Steve

[marker]

Blimey Steve I must remember never to phone you

[christoph404]

Or you could engage them in odd meaningless conversation to waste their time and every time they ask you a question answer it with a question of your own, so;
Are you the householder?
Answer; "Well are you a householder? Did you buy or rent, has your house gone up or down in value? Where are you calling from? Do you enjoy your job?How long have you been with the company, does your wife mind you working these unsociable hours, Im assuming your married. Kids? Good for you, how old? I bet you have to make lots of calls to make up your quota? What proportion of people are rude to you and just hang up? It must be tough".....and so on and so on.They will hopefully mark your name as a time wasting looney and never call you again.

[Steve Crook]

Originally Posted by marker Blimey Steve I must remember never to phone you

Not if you're trying to sell me anything

There are other techniques, but they're almost as devastating.

One is when they ask for you by name, pretend to be a policeman who's investigating some crime that this person has committed. Of course it'd be an offence for them to hang up on a policeman. And the policeman wants to know how long they've know the accused and what sort of relationship they had with him. See how long you can keep that one going for, they're paying the phone bill.

Or if they call you at an office where a few people work then you can give them the run-around. "Mr Crook? No, you've been put through to the wrong extension. But I'll just redirect you". See how long you can keep that one going for.


"You want to speak to Mr Crook? Haven't you heard? Did you know the deceased very well? It was tragic, he had so much to live for" Then start sobbing and they'd have to be very hard hearted to hang up on you

They're just a few of my favourites

Steve

[christoph404]

Originally Posted by Steve Crook "You want to speak to Mr Crook? Haven't you heard? Did you know the deceased very well? It was tragic, he had so much to live for" Then start sobbing and they'd have to be very hard hearted to hang up on you They're just a few of my favourites Steve

I like it! must try that one.

[billy bentley]

Don't know how TPS works but here in New York State we have the Don't Call Registry, one of former Gov. Pataki's few good deeds. We registered and practically never receive a cold call (of course the Police Department Fund Raisers are exempt), when we do before you can finish saying "we're on the Dont Call Registry", the other end of the phone goes dead - without fail. One of life;'s few bureaucratic (?) improvements !

[Arthur Linden-Jones]

Having realised that their opening gambit is usually "Hi, and how are you today" (or something very similar) I have a friend who has a little tape recorder near his phone, with an endless dissertation about a selection of the most unenviable ails and ills ..... "Well, thanks for asking but I've had this trouble with my bowels now for about a week. Everytime I go to the toilet ..... And then there's this sore on my leg that won't heal - it's all full of ......"

His pleasures have been cut short somewhat now that he's been able to list his numbers on the "Do Not Call Register".

[davidb]

i think that in these situations theres very probably a computer monitoring the length of the call .if you come across as a " talker " they [ or even the computer ] will ring you back at a later date ,even though you were just winding the salesman up . best policy i think is just to put the phone down

[Steve Crook]

Originally Posted by billy bentley Don't know how TPS works but here in New York State we have the Don't Call Registry, one of former Gov. Pataki's few good deeds. We registered and practically never receive a cold call (of course the Police Department Fund Raisers are exempt), when we do before you can finish saying "we're on the Dont Call Registry", the other end of the phone goes dead - without fail. One of life;'s few bureaucratic (?) improvements !

Yes, that's essentially what TPS does here (see link above). Every reputable company has signed up for it and follows its guidelines - except when they make the occasional mistake. So you know that if a company hasn't signed up for it then they're not very reputable and you shouldn't do business with them anyway.

A few try to get around it by asking you to take part in a survey. And by pure coincidence, the survey is about whatever they happen to be selling

"Do you have double glazing?"
"No? Would you like some? We can get a salesman to call"
or "You do? Would you like to change/improve it? We can get a salesman to call"

So people calling asking me to take part in a survey usually get the same sort of treatment as any salesmen that call me

Steve

[Arthur Linden-Jones]

The only problem, with the DNC Register in Australia is that the former weak-kneed lilly-livered Government, in a fit of self interest, exempted political parties from having to comply with the "list".

Charities are also exempt, so we're still subjected to the irreplyable question "Hello there. Would you like to help a dying child?" Damned if you do and damned if you don't.

[julian_craster]

Pretend you don't speak English, and make up a 'goobledegook' foreign language - this always works ......

[Steve Crook]

Originally Posted by Arthur Linden-Jones Charities are also exempt, so we're still subjected to the irreplyable question "Hello there. Would you like to help a dying child?" Damned if you do and damned if you don't.

It seems to be crying out for the response "Yes, I've always liked killing children. I'd love to help a child to die"

Steve

[Marky B]

I've had a pig of a day today,and at 5.00pm I got a call.

"Can I speak to Mr Bradshaw?"
"Which one?"
"The homeowner."
"What's it about?"
Click.
I must have upset her somehow. So that's my name off their call list.
Ta Ta
Marky B